My niece Morgan has a 3.9 GPA. However, after high school she wants to study early childhood development and be a pre-school teacher. We as a family feel like she is not living up to her potential, but at the same time, her happiness is what is most important. She has one more year in high school and we are kind of hoping she will have changed her mind by then.
She use to want to be a registered nurse, but she changed her mind. One thing that has not changed is her disire to be a stay at home mom. Her mother got her A.A. in childhood development, but her GPA can't compare to her daughters. What would you do or say to her, if anything, given the same situation?
[question posted by Rozie37]
responses and comments:
Her early childhood goals will be more likely to allow her to be a stay at home mom. I also personally think she will have a broader influence by doing that. Just think of all the kids that she will have a chance to guide. I also know that Nursing profession has a high degree of burnout. [GardenGerty]
Thanks for the follow up, Cats, as I was on the verge of losing my temper. Still may. [GardenGerty]
Thats terrific. Your family must be real proud of her. Lets hope when she does become a mom that her hubby makes a good enough living to where she can be a stay at home mom. Being a good mom is the hardest, most important and most rewarding job there is. I wish her well, and I hope all her dreams come true. [Polly1]
If she wants to study that then go for it. Not only can she help children at that age but also their parents. Those are the most important years in a person's life, developmentaly speaking. I also think that there is alot to be said about a woman who is willing to be a stay at home mom. Not only is she going to have to take care of the kids but also the household budget and many other things. As far as her not living up to her potential: Pre-school teachers could teach their students to read, they teacher future adults to get along with each other and share. As long as she tries hard and does her best then she is living up to her potential. At least she wants to go to college. She could just want to be uneducated, like so many of the high school students today. She sees the need for further education despite the urge to not use it (I want to say:just be a mom, but there is no such thing as "just a mom") Where I am you can get a 4 year degree in early childhood-8th grade and be a teacher. [okkidokitokki]
I have a very good friend who went into Early Childhood dev. and ended up getting her masters which qualified her for teaching at a local college. You never know where this will lead. While good grades are nice, she needs to go where she feels the Lord is leading her, even at her young age. I would not say anything. If this is her choice of career, then everyone should be behind her. She's not running off with the circus! She has chosen to pursue higher education. Sounds like a girl with a good head on her shoulders. It would be worse if she went to law school or something, graduated and then decided that she hated what she did! [rocketj1]
We pressure people to pick a major, but they still all start out with the same basics. English, Math, Science, Psychology. All kinds of things will open up to her. [GardenGerty]
It's not you or your family's choice on what she wants to be whe she get's out of school. You shouldbe glad she even wants to continue her education. Some kids don't even finish high school let alone think about college. Let her make her own choice and don't judge her for not wanting to do with her life what it is you want her to do with her life. I would let her know that I was proud of her and no matter what she does as long as she is happy so am I and am always here for her. Stop stressing as long as she is not into drugs or with the wrong crowd. Let her live HER life, not yours. [denisedora]
I can understand your concern but the word success means different things to different people. In heart heart the little girl wants to learn about and work with children. This is just a start. You never know where she could take her knowledge. Perhaps after taking courses, she will become more interested in another subject such as psychology, or something. Just because this is what you neice wants to do now, doesn't meant that this is what she will want to do forever. Perhaps your niece is trying to become more independant by deciding to find a way to take care of her babies and earn an income at the same time. I would just keep encouraging her to follow her heart and her head. We all find a different purpose in life. [Aprillynn1]
I would go and say Do what makes you happy and don't have any regrets. I hope she is successful with whatever profession she chooses. [chunijole]
I say leave her be because what ever she's doing that makes her happy is a good thing as long as she doesn't get into the wrong crowd or gets into any kind of trouble especially with drugs. After all, she's the one who has to work the job so what ever she chooses to do, let her and support her all the way. [CatsandDogs]
Here is my opinion on it Rozie37. She is young and I think she still might not know what it is that she wants to do with the rest of her life. Like me for example I am in my mid twenties and I am still not sure. You change everyday and what might interest her now, might not 10 years from now. I think a 3.9 is awesome and I am a little jealous I must say because I never got grades like that in school. But I am smart I just never did my homework, I look back and I feel I should have foucused more on that. Things will work out and when she knows she will know for sure. Take care and happy mylotting to you. happy [momtrying2makeit]
She is one of triplets, I have lived with them for a little more than a month now and I do not envy them at all. They have paid the price to earned the grades that they have. They have made many sacrifices and had to do things that their parents wanted them to do, even though they knew that they had a lot of homework to do. Before I moved in, there were times when I would come visit and not even see one of thrm the entire time that I was here. They would be in their room doing their homework and there was no time for anything else. All three of them are in advance placement classes and it seems as if they are already in college. They get mega homework. So I am not jealous of them. I know that I did not have the discipline to do such things when I was their age. I am very happy that they have made a way for themselves to be whatever they want to be. [Rozie37]
Hi my friend ROZ. Look at it this way, as long as the economy of our nation is in the shape it is now MOST households will need to have two incomes so there will always be a need for early child care (development and teaching). Therfore those jobs will always be needed and its possible she could even become a private tutor teacher fo a wealthy family in their home. Good luck to her, just support her no matter what her decision is. i know you will do the right thing. [muscles4me]
I think passion out ways potential in this situation. I was a 4.01 GPA student and did not have the desire to complete college after 1 semester of community college. So I have been working at my current profession for over 9 yrs (I graduated in '99) and even though many may not think it is living up to my potential, I am happy and that is what matters. With not many high school students even going on to college after graduation I would encourage her to keep on that track and support what ever she chooses in her life. Honestly, I think GPA numbers are just numbers to compare students to one another and should not be used to determine what one should or should not do in life. I think the number really just shows how hard someone has to work. I truely believe a 2.9 student can want to be a nurse just like a 3.9 student and achieve that goal it may just take more work and effort on the student. My whole point I guess is that I don't think her GPA she have anything to do with what she wants to do with her life be it a pre-school teacher, a nurse, or a stay at home mom. There are plenty stay at home moms that are very smart but their desire is to raise their children. Nothing wrong with doing what you desire regaurdless of intelligence. [Berryvegas81]
I think she needs to follow what her dreams are in order to be truly happy. Honestly, she could easily make a difference in some of the lives of the children she ends up being with in her career. Realize too that book smarts are not everything it takes to succeed in the world. If succeeding to her is following her dreams, then the career she chooses should be one that makes her happy and that allows her to be a stay at home mom. I would say that unless you can agree on something that is within her "potential" that she also desires to do, then you need to quietly support her. Good Luck. [HazelSkyye54]
Well Rozie if she goes to a community college I think she will be given the option to really decide if that is what she wants to do. I think she should take one class that relates to what she would like to do, then take alot of her general education classes if she is planning to transfer one day to a university. I am going for my paralegal certificate at the college but I have to take alot of required courses if I decide to transfer to a university one day. Just to play it on the safe side I am also going for a degree in Administration of Justice. Yeah with a 3.9 she is doing good but can I ask what are the classes she is taking in high school? I remember when I used to go to high school there were classes that you take to go to the university which were alot more intense then classes just to graduate. My friend graduated with highest honors and me with honors but she took the easier courses. She couldn't get into the university because she hadn't taken the required courses. The best thing in truly finding out what she plans to do is once she is in a college environment. [andalond]
Well I was reading in one person's discussion about them being triplets and being in advanced placement classes. Wow! Well the only thing you can hope for or anyone is that she changes her mind along the way but then if she doesn't and this is what she truly desires then maybe she is going to be something big in this field. In order to be successful you have to like it so maybe she will be above and beyond the call of duty in this arena. [andalond]
In order for someone to be a great preschool teacher she would need to have a high level of intelligence in the kinds of cognitive skills that involve having a lot of common sense, having a good understanding of the children (and human nature in general), having good reasoning abilities, and having a high degree of altruism (among other things). If it's her Nature to want to go into that line of work there's a good chance that the type of intelligence she has may tend to go along the lines of the above areas. The world needs as many gifted preschool teachers as it can get. I don't see that work as less important than any other work. To be honest, one of the reasons I stayed home with my children when they were little was because I saw myself as particularly skilled with children and human nature; and I didn't think anyone else could nurture my children's abilities as well as I could. In other words, sometimes stay-at-homes do so because they ARE intelligent (and not "just because they don't have any job training). Mothers whose skills/intelligence lean toward the "non-child-centered" fields may believe that others will do an equal or better job of nurturing their child's development. If it were my daughter I would be proud of her GPA and proud of her wish to become a preschool teacher and later stay home with her own children. A young woman who has proven that she is capable of getting that GPA will probably find a way to make the most of her own abilities regardless of what she does or doesn't do. I, personally, have, to some degree, wasted a lot of my own "potential" as a result of the setbacks to career aspirations when one takes time off to be a stay-at-home mom. Still, to be honest, I don't care; and I would do the same thing again. What I've lost out on "career ambitions", I've made up for in having three grown kids I'm pretty pleased to have :) . Besides, being a registered nurse is a very difficult job and isn't exactly going to get her a CEO's income either. [LisaHW]
She can be proud (and so can her family) :) Maybe she'll end up opening her own chain of preschools. :) [LisaHW]
you are in a tough spot because you believe that your daughter could become something great but she wants to live maybe a more meaningful life. i would encourage you to let her follow whatever path she wants because that will make her the happiest. she will become great in whatever she does. [bradlejr]
Yes, I have certainly told my niece that it is a good idea to follow her dreams. She is going to be a excellent mother because she is so good with taking care of her nephew. She is a really good person all around and it is a joy having her in the family. [Rozie37]
Childhood development is not a cake walk still. I am a Human development and family studies major with a focus in family studies(which is basically the same thing but a different focus) and I had that same GPA in high school. You have to know A LOT of theories and teaching strategies and so forth. I believe what she wants to do is just as important as nursing. It is a mixed discipline, so she wil be learning things outside of child development that pertains to her, for example, psychology. It is just as rewarding as nursing, but you will get less money. If it makes her happy to help children, let her do it. She can always change her major if she decides she doesn't like it. She will never know until she tries. Also, another option is to be 'undecided' and take other classes as well. [sqishy]
i would do like i always do with my own children. I tell them to follow their dreams. if they want to work at Burger King because they love to make fries, then so what. I want them to be happy. I want them to do what they want to do and be happy! my son is now in college to become a computer tech. but his passion is music. so i have encouraged him to do his music. I got him DJ equipment and am his biggest fan and supporter. I would love for them to make millions of dollars, but i rather them do what they love. That's how you become rich in any way that really matters. Your niece is going to do what makes her happy, so i say support her in that [34momma]
hey girl that's all i can ever do. is support them in their dreams. [34momma]
That must be pretty good, I know that 4.0 is the highest you can get. so your neice must be smart. How are you good to see you are still hanging around. [marciascott]
she may change her mind again - she is certainly a gifted student but ultimately it is up to her. If I were her mother then I would talk to her Guidance Counselor and let the GC do the talking and show your gifted niece what options are open to her.sometimes young people listen to someone outside of their home environment better. Whatever she decides she must be supported and her wishes respected. many blessings [cynthiann]
I'm an Early Childhood Educator. I do this because I followed my heart after I became an engineer. I don't see anything wrong in being an early childhood educator and seeing the kind of people who come into this profession (atleast in India), I'd rather have smarter people who know what they ar doing. I agree that a nurse might be paid more than a pre-school teacher. But I personally feel one needs to follow one's heart and studying early childhood development will also help her to be a stay-at-home mom and get back to work when the kids are older. It's rare to find children who think of their future this early and I'm glad she has given it some thought. If I were in your place, I'd be proud of her (as I'm sure you are). Maybe ask her to think if that's her true calling or she thinks she has the potential (and inclination) to be something else. [SViswan]